LeeAnne Hayden

View Original

Becoming Mrs World America 2021 while in an Ostomy with guest Robin Brown

You can find all episodes on Apple Podcast, Google Podcast, Spotify, or watch on YouTube

Your browser doesn't support HTML5 audio

Becoming Mrs. World America 2021 with guest Robin Brown LeeAnne Hayden

Robin Brown Podcast Interview

Intro  (0:00)

  • Robin Brown - Mrs World America 2021

  • Why she is in her Ostomy - a bit different than the other stories I have had on the show!

Robin’s Ostomy Story - How It Began (1:15)

  • Struggled at age 21 and was diagnosed with Ulcer Colitis.

  • Food poisoning led to an exploratory surgery where they found Ulcer Colitis while in surgery.

  • Struggled for years with different types of medications and bowel resections. And was just constantly sick. 

  • In March 2014 a freak accident happened with our off-road ATV. It malfunctioned and pinned me between the ATV and the back of the garage. 

  • After the accident, I had numerous bowel reconstruction surgeries, and the first area of my body they took care of after the accident and began my journey to an Ostomy. 

  • The bag came 2 in a half hours later after struggling with different conditions. 

  • Started my pageant journey after I got my Ostomy. 

What Brought You Into Wanting To Do Pageants? (4:10)

  • After my Ostomy, in my healing I did a lot of people going on talk shows that had these horrific things happen in their life, then they turned into this magical, appreciative person, and I was angrily stewing on the couch, wondering when this was supposed to happen to me.

  • I was angry and felt like my whole life after the accident changed.

  • Everything I previously used in my life to identify who I was, was gone. I no longer had the job that gave me that validation, and I feel like I lost my identity after the accident and Ostomy. 

  • My friendships changed, my roles in my family changed, and I WAS LOST!

  • After my Ostomy, I hid from my reflection, from my husband, from my neighbors, then something hit me, WHY AM I HIDING from my own life? Every aspect of my life I am hiding and running from it. And after that day I WAS TIRED OF HIDING! 

  • I kept waiting for the reason why all this happened. So finally, when purpose did not come to me, I realized it was up to me to give it purpose. Give my story and health conditions purpose.

  • And it just so happens to come out in Beauty Pageants! 

  • Someone brought up Mrs. Pageants to me. That it’s not only about beauty, but it’s about giving back to your community and doing good things. And this was my ah-hah moment where I said maybe this will help me feel like my life has a purpose and give this value. 

  • Pageants were a way for me to get over my own fears. It was a way for me to put someone else out there that I was longing to see in my own recovery, not someone who survived but is thriving, so that is what I did! 

  • Said I would just do one pageant. 

Pageants (9:07)

  • The first pageant was in 2018 and I was Mrs. Mason County and I competed as Mrs. Mason County for Miss Washington. I did not win, I did not place in the top 10, but I DID wear a swimsuit for the first time asking to be judged!

  • All of the other things that came along with that experience are what I needed at that moment. At that point, it was really that I needed something, and now that has shifted. 

  • Since then, I was chosen to represent Washington at the Miss World America Pageant in Miami last August. This is when it transitioned into making INVISIBLE VISIBLE. 

  • Didn’t wear a smaller bag or change anything about how I normally am with my Ostomy. This was really important to me, because the whole point is you don’t have to have access to different supplies for different events. You can just be you. 

  • Don’t EVER be ashamed for being alive and having survived. 

  • This has been my mission ever since.

  • I will never apologize for someone getting upset about seeing my bag.

  • This is a device that helps me live my life!

Being An Advocate (11:27)

  • A lot of people ask, do you have to show it to advocate for it?

  • No you do not. You don’t have to do it the same way I do it. 

  • You don’t have to be an advocate and show your bag. You can find another way to do it and still stay private and have it as your secret. 

  • 750,000 to a Million people in the US alone with an Ostomy, there are so many people living privately with this. 

  • I do this because the stigmas have to change and not enough people are talking about the things that lead up an Ostomy. - Overall health and wellness and paying attention to your body. 

  • Signs to look for and the symptoms I had that I didn't know were leading to this. 

  • What was normal for my body, was so abnormal compared to a healthy working system. But it was something I was so used to. So people have to look at things like that. 

What Robin Did To Help Her Move Forward In Her Life From Feeling Stuck After Her Ostomy (15:56)

  • First thing was getting involved in online support groups through Facebook.  Being able to see other people out there who knew exactly what I was going through. 

  • Such an important time, now more than ever, to get connected online with others. There are so many resources out there who are continuing to live the same way they did before. 

  • I feel my life is more enhanced than before my surgery because my sickness is so much better. It has allowed me the freedom from a bathroom and the freedom to be gone all day fishing if I wanted to. I couldn’t make plans ahead of time because I didn’t know how sick I would be. 

  • Gave me a lot more stability with my illness. 

  • Connected with other people who had similar circumstances as me. Because there is power in numbers. 

  • The worst thing I could do was pull back and stay away from the support, so I didn't. I ran to the support.

What Are Some Things You Have Done Being Mrs. World America, 2021? (20:37)

  • I have the opportunity this year to go and represent all of the married women at Mrs. World International.  Will be happening later this year. 

    • Once a year I have an excuse to take a vacation with my girls!

  • Have worked with Hollister Medical Group.

    • Reached out to them for sponsorship to the crown. 

    • Paid me to be a speaker in Chicago and did a 3 day engagement there.

    • Met with the Hollister team and so many other Ostomates, online and in-person.

    • Spoke about changes to devices, etc. 

  • Last year I was the Ostomy Awareness Day Champion for the United Ostomy Association Of America. (UOAA) 

    • I got to be the spokesperson for the 10th Anniversary. 

  • I am meeting with a publisher to start writing my first book. A huge challenge, but just trying to learn and grow. 

  • Will be on a few billboards in NYC during fashion week. 

One Thing You Would Want To Leave Listeners With (25:34)

  • However you are feeling, right now, about your Ostomy, about your life.  It is totally okay.  It is totally normal.  We have all been sad, angry, frustrated and felt sorry for ourselves with our Ostomy. 

  • It is okay, as long as you don’t sit in that place of negativity for too long.

  • You are allowed to be ticked off, mad and frustrated, then girl you better pick yourself up because you still have to keep pushing forward. 

  • Be as positive as you can because for me, it makes my days easier. If I focus on the negative it makes it difficult.

    • Focusing on the positive will remind me of my goals I have and the things that I want. 

  • Don’t have to be happy and grateful all the time! Some people think we cannot be angry and happy at the same time. But you can! Just don’t focus on the anger for too long. 

  • Don’t sit in it for too long.

  • Grandma used to say that resonates with me every day.

    • “Take Bigger Steps.”

    • Whatever it is that you're doing or trying to get through or trying to get over… whatever challenge you're facing. Even if it's a tiny step, because you were standing still before. Just take bigger steps. Even if it's that first tiny little step or two, just take bigger steps. Don't allow yourself to sit there too long, and take those steps.

  • Everyone has the power to truly shift what their life looks like, how they feel every day and you just have to remember HOW POWERFUL YOU ARE! 

Closing (29:09)

  • Instagram @ostomyqueen 

  • Can speak through ZOOM for any support groups if looking to talk as well!

  • You are paving the way for a lot of people and we so appreciate that!